Is Regret A Choice?

I spoke to a dear friend recently about a tough decision she has to make. A decision she has been struggling with because of the excruciating fear of regret. I asked her what if she decided not to regret it? Since that conversation the question “Is regret a choice?” has been swirling around my head. Is it really that easy to simply decide not to regret the choices you have made?

Now, of course regret can also be healthy and necessary. I have had plenty of regret around things I have said and not said in the past, and regret has reared its head to teach me a lesson in how to behave in the future but I’m talking about regret around decision making.

Making decisions is not easy and I thank the lord I have had yoga as a tool over these past seven years to give me the space, time, and awareness to find my gut and to listen to her. There are so many gifts that the practice of yoga can give you but to me this is one of the most powerful - learning to trust yourself, to trust your intuition, to trust that you are doing the best that you can in the moment, and trusting that you will be kind enough to forgive yourself if you do realise you made the wrong move.

One of the biggest choices I have ever had to make is a common 21st century woman’s decision, the decision of how many children to have. For me the answer was one. In this country, some women are lucky enough to consciously decide on the number of children they would like to have but the biggest fear around this choice is regret. I have been saddened by how people have reacted to my decision in the past. I have been brought to tears by the opinions of others, mostly strangers. But I made the choice to listen to my gut and not to the fears of others. I knew it was right for me, my daughter, my husband - our team. And I have consciously decided not to regret my choice and enjoy every second of our wonderful family unit rather than live in wonderment of what the alternative could have been like.

Yoga helps you centre yourself and gives you space to listen to your gut. Sometimes our heart can be a little too romantic and can put rose tinted glasses on and say things like “Go for it! All will be well.” Our head can sometimes be the strict head-teacher that tells you to stand up straight and think of the consequences. Our gut tells us the truth. What you really want will come from your gut.

You have always known the answer, the choice you want to make but outside influences can cloud your vision. What other people feel or think can make you numb your own feelings, forgetting that you already know the truth. It’s there. Right in your core, in your gut and you just need some stillness to hear its whispers.

We all need a little help when it comes to making big decisions. Sometimes it can be as simple as a chat with a friend but at the end of the day you are the one that decides what path to take. Yoga gives you the opportunity to train and practice for when that day arrives, the day that the fork in the road appears. Then it’s down to you and only you if you are going to go to the left or go to the right.

If you are interested in starting a yoga practice or hearing more of my thoughts on yoga and life please join my Mum’s Yoga Facebook Page (link in the comments below) where I will be sharing free yoga practices and tips. I hope to see you there.

Namaste.

Laura x